The Separation (For Leigh)

You left without saying good bye
I roll my eyes, look to the sky
I want to curse you but
Instead I just cry
I want to know why and how
You could leave like that
Go so far away when you’re not coming back
And I want answers and facts
And some sort of explanation
So I sit patient, waiting
But my mind stays vacant
and lately,
Answers escape me,
And my head stays empty
Except for endless questions
And aches from tension
And I should mention
That I wish I could be cross with you?
We still had lots to do
And things to see
And maybe I should mention
That I’m kind of cross with me
Because I was too busy being busy
Too wrapped up in my busy-ness
And you were the same,
You had you own interests
So I’m a stressed out mess with no one to blame
Sitting in darkness, I can’t really explain.
And I wonder why we didn’t
Though we couldn’t, but I wished we’d
Spent more time
But we had much on our minds
Still our ship sailed just fine
Because we always checked up and
We always checked in
So I abandon this stressing
And search for some affection.
And I time track, mind map, think back
And find that
Place where I keep all our laughs and our chats
Because we always managed to find time for texts
Sending our regrets
Over internet,
I still love yous and don’t forgets,
And when we gonna get to meet up next?
We need to catch up and
cough up the loads on our chests
And you have always been supportive and encouraging 
Whether I’m laughing or suffering
Singing or muttering
You’re always inspiring, open and honest
And of the things we promised
We said we’d always stay in touch
And even though I can’t see you as much
You can trust that I’ll still talk to you and give time to you,
Try and keep my word true
And keep alive all your love and war stories
Remember how you never bored me
And the way you took the piss
I’ll remember you when you were at your happiest
And I could list the things I will miss the most
But I choose to treasure you
For opening my eyes to a world
I might never have seen
Taking me to places I just wouldn’t have been
And you made me look hard at myself
And the way my eyes see
Tattooed my mind with ideas and new philosophies
And I hope that you became a part of me
Because you Leigh Boy will be beautiful forever
And although we cant do coffee together
I’m sure somewhere in the world that lasts forever
You are still awake in, the essence of life that’s always vibrating
Alive in the smallest pulsation and the biggest wave and
I’ll remember this every time I cry,
Because you’re alive in my tears
So you never really died.
Jo Tedds       November 2006

About joberlowbo

A gypsy twitches and throws a needle to the sky. Stitching time and sewing sides, With laughter we dry our tears, Strangle our fears and confront the mirrors smears. Chocolate smudged cheeks. Skin on skin. Sketch pad. Memories fade and are replayed inaccurately and it is actually. Ok.
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